Handwritten by Guest Author Jacob Cramer

Every year, my grandma writes me and my brother Chanukah cards. They’re personalized, filled with love, and usually also filled with gelt: chocolate coins wrapped in gold foil when we were younger, and a small bit of money today. This Chanukah, her card was just what I needed as I stepped off of a rollercoaster of a semester.

Backstory: I consciously decided against buying into college stereotypes as I started my first year, worried I’d gain the infamous Freshman 15. By a stroke of luck, or more accurately, by opting to snack on KIND granola bars and Boom Chicka Pop sea salt popcorn over dining hall food, I avoided losing my geeky, untoned physique resembling any of the guys from The Social Network.

I’m flattering myself. I’m more of a Sheriff Woody from Toy Story.

And there’s more similarity between us than meets the eye. 

I’m no pull-string cowboy rag doll, but the feeling of being a toy in someone else’s games has colored my sophomore year with gloomy grays and blues that have weighed me down, a feeling I’d gladly trade for some belly fat.

New York Times writer Samantha Stainburn says it’s all part of the “sophomore slump.”

Photo by Matt Ragland on Unsplash

“No one seems to care that you’re back on campus,” she writes. “Quirky first-year seminars have been replaced by large foundation classes […] You’re not high enough up the totem pole to do fun stuff like join a research team or lead student organizations. With the newness of college gone, malaise sets in.”

In my major, cognitive science, we call this phenomenon regression to the mean. Simply put, it’s impossible to feel "infinity and beyond” all the time. If you’re over the moon your first year, it’s likely you’ll fall from the stars the next.

My landing was less than graceful. I cried; I pitied myself; my friends changed and so did I.

Coming home from school in December, I felt exhausted. When my dad handed me a card with my name and address squiggled in wobbly cursive instantly recognizable as my grandma’s, love and optimism supplanted the anxiety I’d been feeling.

A card that might have only taken five minutes to write did all that. Her handwritten words made me feel like I mattered.

Handwritten is beautiful.

Each word is thought out; each sentence is affirmed in the writer’s mind as they scribble dots, exclamation marks, and semicolons among their thoughtfully-placed letters. And everything handwritten has power: it can be touched, it can be felt, it can be cherished. Handwritten is for a bedside table; handwritten is for re-reading when you need it; handwritten is for sharing with others.

So I’m sharing these words of love with you today, albeit digitally. And if you’re not feeling the greatest, please know: you’ve got a friend in me.

What’s your favorite way to cultivate love?

According to Jacob, why small moments matter: Life can be a whirlwind! Small moments guide us through the storm.

Jacob and his Grandma

Bio: Jacob Cramer is a Cleveland, Ohio native and a sophomore at Yale University studying cognitive science with a focus on language and development. He is the founder and executive director of Love for the Elderly, a nonprofit fighting loneliness with love for our elders. His other passions include acting, teaching, cultivating wellness, playing ukulele, and writing. Find him on Twitter and Instagram @jacobcraa

His nonprofit is hosting Letter to an Elder Day on February 26th. Celebrate with Jacob by writing a letter to an elder in your life or to an anonymous stranger. Learn more at lovefortheelderly.org/letters

Brave Tutu Note: I met Jacob through his incredible nonprofit Love for the Elderly. In 2018, I created a #NoDateFeb and #LiveOutLove initiative. We highlighted Love for the Elderly and encouraged others to live out the love they have in their hearts and participate in the Letters of Love program. In 2019, we partnered with Love for the Elderly to celebrate Brave Tutu’s fourth birthday (check out this Instagram “takeover.”) I was blown away by Jacob’s enthusiasm and mission. I knew he would have refreshing words to share with our readers. I’m so excited he agreed to be a guest author.

Remember,

Your Brave Tutu (You’re brave, too-too!)

-Take courage in delight. Discover power in small moments.