Covid Connection

A man jogs towards me on the sidewalk and then goes into the street to give me six feet of space. I wave and smile. He does too. In that moment, there is a connection of care. In the necessary distance, I link with this stranger. It’s a total juxtaposition; we join through separation. Bizarre.

During the longest March of our lives, I listened to a podcast from one of my favorite thinkers of our time, Rob Bell. In “I Am Calling You to Talk About the Coronavirus” he branched into a discussion about trees. How they are separate above ground, but intertwined below. He said, “trees appear to be independent standing entities, but what we know is that they’re all intimately connected and talking to each other.” They are literally rooted in connection. Their unseen relationship sources nourishment as they intuitively provide each other with what they need.

The runner and I were trees. Providing space. Linked in the distance.

Rob elaborated on our physically distanced connection during Covid-19. Like the trees, we are connected in a web of life, or what Rob calls a “network of vitality”. In a way, pre-coronavirus, modern technological advances cut us off from each other. But in spite of the horror and uncertainty, this disease pushed us together again. Our shared empathy, our collective dread—even the sense that “we’re all in this together”—has united us in entirely new ways.

I’m recovering from Advanced Surface Ablation, an eye surgery that takes 3-6 months to see at full capacity (same end result as Lasik). Screens are not my favorite right now, so I’ve picked up the phone more than ever before. Pre-mid-March corona, I had friends dropping off meals to give hugs. I relished those visits but couldn’t wait to return to the “real world.” That second weekend in March—the one where we were encouraged to practice social distancing—I finally felt ready to reconnect and it was impossible. It’s a bit comical. But, as I’ve been socially distanced for over a month, I’ll share my pro-tips on maintenance of our tree connections:

● Pick up the phone

● Leave voicemails (It seems people think a “missed call” is the new code for “call me back”, but many times the “missed calls” are just that—missed. Often the true joy is in getting the message.)

● Take phone walks with friends. Describe what you are seeing to each other so it feels like you are on the walk together.

● Check in with a simple “I’m thinking of you” text

I’m definitely leaning in to the re-phrasing— let’s be physically distant, not socially distant. However, I’ll be real, despite all the calls and texts, this season is a challenge. I’m single and I live alone. Therefore, like many, I’m struggling with this necessary isolation.

My necessary boosts come as I share the news of my first book*, a humorous picture book parody for adults. People are reaching out, excited alongside me. We are separated by distance and screens. But every time someone comments or texts “I’ve pre-ordered” or “I’m sharing your book with all my friends”, I feel a genuine reach across this divide. It’s keeping me going and I’m searching for ways to boost others.

I know I’m not alone. During this pandemic, it’s beautiful to see people providing support. Many are making masks, checking on neighbors, encouraging teddy bear hunts, writing letters to the elderly and even calling perfect strangers via QuarantineChat. Others offer joy in the form of dinosaur parades and mini picnic tables for squirrels. True to Brave Tutu’s mission, power exists in these small moments. People are taking courage in delight.

Back to Rob Bell’s explanation: “sometimes a tree won’t have the minerals it needs to continue growing and flourishing, so it’ll send out a message through its roots to other trees, of what minerals & nutrients it needs. And other trees, sometimes great distances away, will receive the message…and will send what’s needed to that tree.”

What message do you need to send out? How can others, across the distance, help nourish your spirit? How are you reaching out to do the same? What are some ways you are staying rooted?

Remember,

Your Brave Tutu (You’re brave, too-too!)

-Take courage in delight. Discover power in small moments.

*My first book, ALEXANDRA AND THE AWFUL, AWKWARD, NO FUN, TRULY BAD DATES, is available for pre-order with Ulysses Press and I can’t wait to do a special Brave Tutu piece with more details. This Covid Connection piece felt front burner.